Albus Percival Wulfric… BRIAN… Dumbledore.

May 2, 2010

It’s Wizarding Independence Day! You can bet your ass I’m celebrating! Pumpkin juice sounds… iffy, so booze and pumpkin pie it is! And now to celebrate the greatest character from the series (besides Neville and Luna): DUMBLES.

“We must try not to sink beneath our anguish, Harry, but battle on.”

“By all means continue destroying my possessions. I daresay I have too many.”

“To the well organized mind, death is but the next great adventure.”

“Humans have a knack for choosing precisely the things that are worst for them.”

“Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!”


“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.”

“If you put me in prison, I could break out, of course, but what a waste of time, and frankly I can think of a whole host of things I’d rather be doing.”

“Scars can come in handy. I have one myself above my left knee that is a perfect map of the London Underground.”

“I see a light in the kitchen. Let us not deprive Molly any longer of the chance to deplore how thin you are.”

“No, I was merely reading the Muggle magazines,” said Dumbledore. “I do love knitting patterns.”

“The shock of her desertion may have contributed to his early death – or perhaps he had simply never learned to feed himself.”

“It’s the unknown we fear when we look upon death and darkness, nothing more.”

“Well, it’s just that you seem to be labouring under the delusion that I am going to – what is the phrase? – come quietly. I am afraid I am not going to come quitely at all, Cornelius.”

“Tell me one last thing,” said Harry. “Is this real? Or has this been happening inside my head?”
“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?”

FOLLOW THIS ENTIRE SHOW. DUMBLES, VOLDIE, AND SNIVELLY ARE F***ING RIOTS. AND RON JUST EATS EVERYTHING. p.s. no singing in this video.

And here I was, trying to study dementia. Psh. Being prepared for exams is for pussies anyway…

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